Sunday, January 30, 2011
My name is Riley. I'm a 15 year old boy, and for 10 months now I have been suffering from an eating disorder.
My life has been happy and healthy. I was born healthy and raised happily, my mother died when I was young and I guess I never dealt with it as well as I could have; other than that, things in general are great.
I've had issues with food in the past. I used to suck in my ribs and show everybody my bones when I was younger, and have always had an interest in nutrition and food.
I remember when it really started though. I was at my Nan and Pop's house in another state around March 2010.
One night I was in the shower after dinner. I thought to myself 'What would happen if I was to force my food out so I'm not as full?'
Sure enough, I did it when I got out of the shower. I thought it was gross, and said that I would never do it again.
I came home a couple of weeks later and began to think I was gaining weight. I was about 56kg and 168cm tall, which is in the average to low weight range. I started to obsess over what I ate; I ate healthier things, when I actually was eating, which lead me into not eating breakfast in the morning, not eating lunch at school, and then purging in the shower after dinner.
After a few months of doing the same thing, sometimes eating regular meals and never binging, I began using fiber tablets at school to decrease my appetite, sometimes taking about 5 at once to fill me up. I also drank a lot of water to hydrate me during the day and after purging, consuming about 3 liters a day.
During July 2010, I restricted to 1 babyfood jar a day, which planned to continue for 5 days, but only lasted 3 as I collapsed in my school gym. After going to my Auntie's that night for tea, I had a discussion with my Nanny in the car on the way home. She made me promise that I hadn't been throwing up after I eat, which I refused to do. Worried as a normal grandmother would be, she spoke to my Dad while I was in the shower, purging.
Dad walked in on me that night, and after about an hour of talking, we seeked help from the local GP who then referred us to a place about half an hour away, where we now go every week to every fortnight.
I went for a 2 week program for treatment from the 13th to the 27th of December 2010, which pushed me to my full potential and showed me that there are so many people around who care for me. Although I am doing this all for the people around me, I'm doing it for myself, much like everybody else suffering from an eating disorder.
Not only does it take over lives, it takes everyone else away too.
Since I've been out of treatment, I've slipped back once, and I have a much more positive look on things because of the people I have met in there, and the opportunities I have had to reflect.
The reason I am sharing my story is because I see so many stories on here, and I find so much inspiration.
I just want to put it out to everybody that ANYBODY can suffer from an eating disorder, and ANYBODY can recover from one, too.
Kind regards and have a happy new year.
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