Showing posts with label Tips for Real Women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tips for Real Women. Show all posts

Friday, April 4, 2008

TIPS FOR REAL WOMEN...




LADIES:

If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant "fix-me-up."

REAL WOMEN:

If you over-salt a dish while you're cooking, that's too damn bad. Please recite with me The Real Women's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes."

------------------------------------------------------------

LADIES:

Stuff a miniature marshmallow at the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice-cream drips.


REAL WOMEN:

Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake. You're probably sitting your ass on the couch, with your feet up anyway.

------------------------------------------------------------

LADIES:

To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.


REAL WOMEN:

Buy boxed mashed potato mix and you don't have to worry about the potatoes growing arms and legs.

------------------------------------------------------------

LADIES:

Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.


REAL WOMEN:

Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You might still have the headache, but who cares!

------------------------------------------------------------

LADIES:

When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the inside of the cake.

REAL WOMEN:

Go to the bakery...they'll even decorate the son of a b*tch for you.

-----------------------------------------------------------

LADIES:

Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.


REAL WOMEN:

Sara Lee frozen freakin' pie directions do not include brushing egg whites, so I don't do it.

------------------------------------------------------------

LADIES:

If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.


REAL WOMEN:

Go ask the very hot neighbor guy to do it.

------------------------------------------------------------

And finally the most important tip....

LADIES:

Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.


REAL WOMEN:

Leftover wine??

~~~~~~~~~~


LINKS:
Pictures:

http://bigisbeautiful-marie.blogspot.com/2007/09/real-women.html
http://www.winestoreblog.com

Follow on Buzz