A woman called a local hospital...
"Hello. Could you connect me to the person who gives information about patients? I'd like to find out if a patient is getting better, doing as expected, or getting worse."
The voice on the other end said, "What is the patient's name and room number?"
It's "Sarah Finkel, Room 302."
"I'll connect you to the nursing station".
"Third floor nursing station. How can I help you?"
"I'd like to know the condition of Sarah Finkel in Room 302."
"Just a moment. Let me look at her records. Mrs. Finkel is very well.
In fact she had two full meals, her blood pressure is fine. She is to be taken off the heart monitor in a couple of hours, and if she continues this improvement, Dr. Cohen is going to send her home on Tuesday."
The woman said "What a relief. Oh, that's fantastic. That's wonderful news."
The nurse said, "From your enthusiasm, I take it you are a close family member, or are you a very close friend?"
"Neither. I'm Sarah Finkel in Room 302. Nobody tells me F*ck all in here."