Well, imagine my surprise this morning when I opened my e-mail and discovered messages from none other than my gorgeous (and very funny) mole applicant, the one and only NIKKI PILKINGTON!
It appears I have been barking up the wrong tree. You know, when you discover you're wrong, and I'm talking REALLY WRONG, it's only right to fess up.
Firstly, Nikki, please accept my sincere and humble apologies. I'm hoping you're of the opinion that any publicity, be it bad or good, is, as convicted felon Martha Stewart is so fond of saying, "a good thing."
Here are the messages I received from Nikki last night, and I have to say she's an awfully good sport:
"Oh my god!! I'm famous!!
seriously, there is no way I have anything to do with Kimmer, although a couple of years ago, whoever was in charge of PR (not jeannie) asked me to do some promotion. I think I got one sign up LOL
I haven't been in touch as I have so many new clients in my real business that i've had no time to be a mole - I was actually just going to send you my login so you could mole away yourself, but i guess you've ruined that now.... although i'm happy to help anti-kk sites with search engine positions....
As for the comment that i am a skinny russian bride - LOL i wish!! The reason i found kimkins in the first place is that i'm far from skinny!!! "
"Ooohh I'm famous!!! For the record, i'm not a russian bride (nor skinny or pretty LOL).I have just been really busy with work and have had no time to look in KK, sorry. But thanks for outing me Medusa - way to go :) My actual plan was to send you my login so you could mole away in your own time. I guess by now my login has been cancelled....A long time ago (before jeannie and right at the beginning of KK) I was asked to promote it on a 'cost per signup' deal - I think I got one signup :) I had no time then for CPS deals and I have no time now.I also have no time for people who post rubbish about me on the internet, when that is my livelihood and pays to feed my children. There is a phone number on every page of my website Medusa - you were welcome to call that at any time. "
~~~~~[NOTE: This is the email Nikki received from Kimmer in response to Nikki's request for her password, which she had forgotten. I have deleted personal info from the e-mail]
"here you go - enjoy - please email me when you've posted your apology/
From: Kimmer [mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org]
Sent: ***** ***** ***** *****
Who knows what happens with computers? I reset
your password below. [SNIP]
Department: Membership & Payments
"Oooh and, as a 'Kimmer' plant, i've not actually sent you anything medusa - how fab a mole am I? Surely if I were working for Kimmer I would have sent you 'something' ?~~~~~
Or maybe i've been too busy with my new book launch, new clients and my family, to ferret around kimkins.com?
I don't support Kimmer at all, but neither do i support the paranoia and false accusations that seem to follow her detractors."
"The first thing that struck me was why on earth would an "Internet Marketing~~~~~
Expert" want to be my mole."
Why the hell not? Since when does what i do for a living affect my belief that Kimmer is bad?
"how crap a mole am I that i haven't sent you anything? if i were kimmer's 'plant' then surely i would have been in touch? LOL "
Nikki, you made my morning. You have a great sense of humour and are an extremely good sport. God, I admire that.
It appears that Medusa has pissed on her chips. But I'm hoping, Nikki, that you're the forgiving sort and that I'm still able to take advantage of your offer to "help anti-kk sites with search engine positions."
My fellow bloggers and I need your expertise, Nikki, so any help you can give us will be greatly appreciated, especially in light of the fact that Heidi Diaz aka Kimmer is still flogging her deadly Kimkins starvation diet and continuing to lure new people to her website, despite all the bad publicity out there about her and her deadly diet. Unfortunately, Kimkins continues to rank at the top of Google listings. Any help you can give us will be greatly appreciated and you will have our undying gratitude.
Now, how can I get my hands on a copy of your new book? I'll send you my payment via Paypal :^)